Many people can deal with something called Gender Dysphoria but what is it? Who does it affect? When does it affect them? How does someone overcome this? All will be discussed through out this blog post because this can be a very serious thing for someone to go through. You may not even notice it is happening to someone in your life. It is incredibly important we all understand what GD is because when we do we can accept it and grow in knowledge to help create a safe environment for people feeling GD.
So, the obvious first question, what is Gender Dysphoria? To understand this we must first grasp what the difference is between gender and sex. Gender is the social construct usually denoting characteristics of either female or male which varies depending of cultural influences. Gender is often viewed as expectations someone should meet physically, behaviourally and personality wise depending on the label you choose to identify with/or are allocated with. On the other hand, sex is assigned to someone at birth due to their physical anatomy making them either female or male.
(Of course within gender and sex there are various other categories which will be discussed in a separate blog post due to the expanse of the topic).
GD is commonly described as conflict a person feels between their gender identity and assigned sex at birth.
This means, for example, a person born with male genitalia (their sex is male) feeling conflicted because they identify with a gender identity that does not match their sex. They may instead identify with the female gender, gender fluid, gender non-binary etc.
Each person may face GD in a different way as we are all different individuals. The three main types of Gender Dysphoria are social, body and mind. Social involves feeling discomfort when presenting yourself socially as your assigned birth gender, body is feeling that discomfort when your body physically doesn't match the gender you feel (female genitalia when you identify with the male gender) and lastly mind is discomfort when your emotions and mind don't match up with your gendered identity.
GD can affect anyone at any age. It does not discriminate and it doesn't affect everyone at the same time in life. A child may know from a very young age of 4 years old but someone else may not figure this out until later in life at 60 years old. Both are acceptable of course. A common misconception is that someone does not know or feel GD until puberty but it isn't always the case.
It may also be the case that you experience this gender dysphoria for a short time or question it and don't necessarily think anything of it after that. However, if this is persistent and ongoing it is usually because your gender identity and sex don't match up.
You don't have Gender Dysphoria? Okay well let's give you an example so you can relate to the discomfort and pain GD can cause. Your genitalia determined that you are female and therefore due to social constructions your gender identity growing up is therefore female also. However, on the inside you know you aren't a female, you're male. You hate your body because it is the complete opposite to how you feel. You feel uncomfortable telling people you're female in social situations because it feels wrong and feels like you're lying. You also would prefer to wear masculine clothes, to outwardly portray your correct gender but due to societal expectations that is frowned upon. This leaves you lost, ashamed, confused and uncomfortable in your own skin everyday.
Imagine knowing on the inside that you are male but then being forced everyday to be a female. Wear dresses, make up, heels and introduce yourself as 'Miss' (of course this is a stereotype).
Consequently due to this GD, many people then suffer from depression, anxiety, eating disorders, physical harm or isolation. If this is you, don't suffer alone. Seek help from your doctors or even family members or friends. There are ways GD can be helped and made easier. The final outcome would hopefully be Gender Reassignment Surgery. Matching your gender and sex.
If you don't have GD what can you do to help someone that does? Have open discussion with them about it, how they feel. They may often ask to be addressed by specific pronouns or go by a different name that does match how they feel. Even something like this can create that feeling of acceptance. Acceptance goes a very long way.
Remember, we all have a right to feel the way we do. If you feel confused about your gender it is completely normal. Society may tell you otherwise but you feel the way you do because it is you. You are you. We accept you. We celebrate you.
Be kind to one another. Be open to other people's way of living truthfully.
F*ck gender normativity.
Rainbow Talk
If you need help, reach out. I'm here always.
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